The First Day of Summer

The light was green, 4am, I knew it was ok to proceed,

your screams I will never forget, our bodies jolted, slightly twisted

In less than 10 seconds we were crashed,

oh the adrenaline took hold as I climbed and blasted myself from the wreckage

Police and the lights, as the witness and suspect stay at the scene

You were taken away, front seat of the 5-0  I be, one step in the ER and I drop

down to my knees and the pain is unbearable

Hours passed, mother by my side, after the Norcos and Morphine

I find myself by your side

You kiss my forehead and tell me not to cry, you love me, before you leave goodbye

That was our last hoorah together…

Happy Birthday Grandpa

 

Amber Choisella

Death, Fitness, and Spirituality

image

Death is a transition of physical to non-physical and although I know this, I accept this, it still hurts. Ending one chapter and beginning a new page is difficult but definitely doable. So I spend my time in the gym, sweating out the sweat my body happily releases, just like the tears my eyes so easily create rivers for this drought of a heart I possess. So I push forward,  it’s hard,  it hurts,  but I keep going. Believing in something more,  something more that gives some sort of explanation or a sense of peace,  that’s spirituality. Combine the three together and I’m finding…… a restructured me.

Oh yeah and this 21 day detox of no sugar natural or processed, is atrocious… on my 3rd day and I wanna give up and go grab some McDonalds lovely salted fries… but I have my fitness circuit class to attend in a few… I think I’ll pass, 18 days and counting… a revamped me.

Winter 2013

Attempted murder. Stabbed and left me alone to bleed.

No doubt, death would’ve been best. Alone. I never

again believed in love. He said he could never be the man

I deserved, I never understood why, but he was right.

He wasn’t man enough for me but he was man enough for

her. Well deserved. Applaud. Thank you for giving me less than

because you could. That was the last time I swore I would fall in love.

Love, what is that, with another, that vulnerability, to fall within?

That was years ago yet I’ve never loved another like I loved him,

the greatest sin, but I’m ready, I think ….

To love like I loved him, but better this time, more complete.

Tranquility.  I’m not who I was nor who you think I should be.

Winter 2013 should have killed me, but instead it led me free…..