Your soul decided to go Home two years ago. I remember the moment your Soul spoke to me and you told me, “I’m tired, I’m tired”. At that very moment I saw you as though I was viewing you in tunnel vision. Your mouth didn’t move. Immediately tears rolled down my face and I knew your time here on this dense plane was temporary. The last sentence you said to me was, “I love you too Amber”. I ran from the room and HE ran after me and held me as my soul wept. The wall hallway tormented me and I felt small, almost non-existent as if life wasn’t worth living anymore. An existence without you was inconceivable. Here at the age of 27 I felt life was no longer prevalent. August 18th I sat next to your bed and read you a Sylvia Browne book about crossing over. I stuttered fighting against fatigue and sorrow. I was suppose to spend the night with you and twin but the hospital didn’t have an extra chair bed so before I left I sat beside you and grabbed your bruised hand, kissed your third eye, and stroked your face.
As I was walking out of the door I said, “I’ll spend the night with you tomorrow night. I love you Babe”, and without delay I heard, “I love you too”. No hesitation I said, “She still here, I just heard her say I love you too”. I left my twin and my greatest love for the last time. 3am my Mom called and simply said, “She’s gone”.
This time last year I was inconsolable, but I heard your voice tell me to get up and go to church so church is where I went. It was healing and what I needed. All last week I kept hearing and noticing your name…. Madeline, Maddie. For example, I was speaking to you on my way to work on Wednesday last week which isn’t uncommon. When I got to work I had an urge to look at the painted portrait that hangs on the wall besides my work desk and I noticed the artist’s name was Maddie and it was dated ’16. I’ve been sitting at this desk for 3 months and never noticed this. Over the weekend I was speaking to twin and I told her what I had been noticing and I told her I knew that was your way of communicating with me. She went to see a medium and at the end of the reading and WE came up. She asked if she had a sister, which she said yes. She then went onto say, that YOU were with me during this time and were encouraging me to heighten my confidence with a project that I’m doing. That gave me the validation that you ARE and HAVE BEEN communicating with me. Oh Babe, I miss your smile and your touch but because of your love, I know life again is worth living. I’m okay too, I’m surviving this existence without your physicality. I can do this because I’m your granddaughter.
I’ve never known a love as pure nor a soul as beautiful and wise as yours.
Love your Baby.